LESSONS WE LEARNED FROM THE OLYMPICS:
And some sensible suggestions, mind ya!
It never fails to amaze me that a country ruled by trigger-happy-good-for-nothing-junta COULD NOT even send somebody to Target Shooting in the Olympics? Ha! That’s what they do best, right? Shoot innocent monks and civilians AND they have been practicing for decades anyway; so, why not get a medal for it? Dumb nitwits!
Brunei should drown the officials (who failed to register their athletes on time) in crude oil. Were they busy polishing their 18k-gold door knobs? Huh! Prepare the registrations 6-months prior, buy a new jet 3-months prior and fly your asses over there 3-days prior next time.
The Philippines should concentrate on sending (and supporting) locally-honed athletes instead of the foreign-trained ones. The former would do it for the country’s pride while the latter do it mainly for sponsorships. We all know that so, don’t argue.
Singapore should give a pre-departure crash course on “How to Respect the National Flag” to ignorant ‘imported’ locals. I wanted to rip the guts out of the flag bearer as I watch her drag it about the stadium. What’s her name? Ah! – Li Jia Wei, I hate you.
Cambodia should raise their national athletes’ monthly training allowance from US$30 (no typo-error there, it’s really thirty!) to US$300. The Poipet Border alone can earn at least US$11,000 a day in under-the-table fees – why not share some of it to the athletes? Greedy Immigration Officials. Pfft!
Laos & Cambodia should send more athletes out. Saturate regional games (which are mostly held in neighbouring Thailand or nearby Malaysia and Singapore) so I don’t see any excuse in spending a little more. Send the athletes by trains or buses if you have to. We promise not to laugh.
Indonesia, obviously, is on the right track -- Bringing in medals since 1992. But with 235 million people? – You guys can do better. Give the Gunawan brothers their OWN island to train more badminton athletes.
Malaysia has some very talented boxers in Perlis, Perak and Kedah. Find and train swimmers among the Badjaos or Tau-Laut in Sabah and Sarawak. With your unlimited funds? – Invest it in more athletes.
Timor Leste should concentrate on other sports when it’s Olympics time. Send the runners to the SEA Games or the Asian Games instead where most athletes have equally shorter legs. I got 2 words put together for you – weightlifting.
Hey, Vietnam! Since you guys are the closest to China – why not train some of your athletes there? Or send some sports scientists over to China and learn more (then tell us their secrets, ok?). Lovely.
Oh, Thailand, my Thailand. Have we really been sold by our own officials? Since we should have won more than 3 Golds in Boxing alone…I wanna believe the rumours. Just don’t let me catch ‘em.
IN OUR REGION…countries with lots of athletes don’t have money. And countries with lots of money, don’t have athletes. Let’s help each other, shall we?
Brunei should drown the officials (who failed to register their athletes on time) in crude oil. Were they busy polishing their 18k-gold door knobs? Huh! Prepare the registrations 6-months prior, buy a new jet 3-months prior and fly your asses over there 3-days prior next time.
The Philippines should concentrate on sending (and supporting) locally-honed athletes instead of the foreign-trained ones. The former would do it for the country’s pride while the latter do it mainly for sponsorships. We all know that so, don’t argue.
Singapore should give a pre-departure crash course on “How to Respect the National Flag” to ignorant ‘imported’ locals. I wanted to rip the guts out of the flag bearer as I watch her drag it about the stadium. What’s her name? Ah! – Li Jia Wei, I hate you.Cambodia should raise their national athletes’ monthly training allowance from US$30 (no typo-error there, it’s really thirty!) to US$300. The Poipet Border alone can earn at least US$11,000 a day in under-the-table fees – why not share some of it to the athletes? Greedy Immigration Officials. Pfft!
Laos & Cambodia should send more athletes out. Saturate regional games (which are mostly held in neighbouring Thailand or nearby Malaysia and Singapore) so I don’t see any excuse in spending a little more. Send the athletes by trains or buses if you have to. We promise not to laugh.Indonesia, obviously, is on the right track -- Bringing in medals since 1992. But with 235 million people? – You guys can do better. Give the Gunawan brothers their OWN island to train more badminton athletes.
Malaysia has some very talented boxers in Perlis, Perak and Kedah. Find and train swimmers among the Badjaos or Tau-Laut in Sabah and Sarawak. With your unlimited funds? – Invest it in more athletes.
Timor Leste should concentrate on other sports when it’s Olympics time. Send the runners to the SEA Games or the Asian Games instead where most athletes have equally shorter legs. I got 2 words put together for you – weightlifting.Hey, Vietnam! Since you guys are the closest to China – why not train some of your athletes there? Or send some sports scientists over to China and learn more (then tell us their secrets, ok?). Lovely.
Oh, Thailand, my Thailand. Have we really been sold by our own officials? Since we should have won more than 3 Golds in Boxing alone…I wanna believe the rumours. Just don’t let me catch ‘em.IN OUR REGION…countries with lots of athletes don’t have money. And countries with lots of money, don’t have athletes. Let’s help each other, shall we?
--Pisanu in Chiang Mai
28 Aug 2008
